Oscars 2013: Final thoughts

So it’s all over for another year.  Take the diamantes back to the unusually trusting jewellers; take a couple of nights of from watching movies; and please please PLEASE stop blogging.  AND THE WINNER IS…

Courtesy of Natasha Searston – http://www.natashasearston.com – @natashasearston

A full rundown of the winners is here, and below are some thoughts which, to my eternal shame, are substantially tainted by a haze of whisky and sleep deprivation.

The ceremony will be one of the least memorable in history (and, if my memory serves me correctly, it has some pretty forgettable competition).

Other than a couple of zingers, Seth MacFarlane – who courted much enthusiastic expectation beforehand – put in a flat performance.  If we learnt anything from Hugh Jackman’s brilliant turn as host, song and dance men are far more successful than out-and-out comedians.  The latter will always be judged on the strength of their one-liners, which are perennially tame.

Jennifer Hudson and, much to my surprise, Catherine Zeta-Jones were belting and the Les Mis set-piece was stirring, but no other musical number stood out (other than the “We Saw Your Boobs” one by MacFarlane which was an amusing diversion but not enough to redeem him).  The Bond tribute was hugely under-cooked.   A few clips we’ve seen a thousand times before (Andress/Berry/Craig emerging from the sea; Blofeld stroking a cat; some explosions; etc) and then one song by the admittedly awesome Shirley Bassey.

And the presenters were utter tat; the highlight somehow being the underwritten exchange between Paul Rudd and Melissa McCarthy.  That’s when you want to wheel out the funny folk.  Where was Stiller?  Where was Ferrell?  Galifianakis? Jack Black?  Fey?  Gervais?  Carrell?  Even perky Emma Stone, who was the best bit about last year’s show.  Captain Kirk’s appearance was amusing for about 10 seconds, but then that just got weird.

God, the more I think about it, the more annoyed I am.  They have all year to plan the thing.  They know its coming, but still they so consistently underwhelm.

But the results, regardless of their predictability, will be dredged up time and again by Oscar bores…like me:

–  Daniel Day-Lewis, a proper actor rather than a Hollywood archetype, became the most decorated lead man in Oscar history.

–  Best Picture went to a film not nominated for Best Director, for the first time in over 20 years.

–  Jennifer Lawrence’s win will be the first of a good few.

–  Ang Lee won Best Director for the second time – but neither were accompanied by Best Picture.

–  First Oscar for a Bond film in over 45 years.

–  Adele is an Oscar winner (and Seth MacFarlane is an Oscar nominee).

–  Michael Haneke finally picked up an Oscar after two Palme d’Ors.

–  And is this the end of Spielberg?  If Lincoln isn’t good enough, then maybe this is the voters’ way of telling the old war horse that he just isn’t relevant any more.

And that’s all I have to say about that.  Stop typing…finally…any second…now

85th Academy Awards Best Picture Nominees: Lincoln

Courtesy of Jade Ogden – http://jadeogdenjewellery.blogspot.co.uk/

And finally, to bring an emancipation to this trek through the Best Picture nominees, we at last arrive at Lincoln.  And – in true Spielbergian fashion – I’ve decided to end on a crescendo.  My pick of the pics.  For me, Lincoln should win the whole caboodle.

Rather than towing the typical biopic line, Lincoln spans only a few months.  As he struggles to finally bring union to his bitterly Civil War-torn country, he believes (by God, does he believe) that creating a law to make slavery illegal will bring the conflict to a juddering stop.  Using the dual forces of  silver-tongue and underhand promises of power to the swing voters, he does everything he can to bring about the 13th Amendment, even if it kills him.

Lincoln demonstrates, in a good way, exactly what a Best Picture should be.  Its subject matter is clearly weighty and historically crucial (if not always, I understand, accurate). It is high in drama and low in subtlety.  It delivers the definitive depiction of one of history’s most significant and written about leaders.  It is a parliamentary procedural drama – one indeed of which we are blatantly aware of the outcome – yet it is compelling from start to end.

Of course it is undeniably aided by an unforgettable eponymous performance.  Daniel Day-Lewis isn’t just like (our idea of) Lincoln, he is (our idea of) Lincoln.  Expecting a fully charged, both-barreled Bill the Butcher/Daniel Plainview act-athon, Day-Lewis’s portrayal is measured and humble.  Inevitably, it stirs when it needs to but it consistently convinces.

The rest of the cast shouldn’t be forgotten.  Tommy Lee Jones in particular is fully deserving of his nomination and, in my view, should pick up his second statue.   His radical pro-emancipation Thaddeus Stephens is a larger than life belligerent old bastard, and in Jones is clearly enjoying Tony Kushner’s witty diatribes.  A key scene in which he resists the goading of his younger, more educated opposite number, to give a reasoned testimony instead of yet another soapbox topped rant, is wonderfully played, and resonates even more deeply at the film’s conclusion.

Despite how big Spielberg’s picture is, at times it feels theatrical.  One can imagine Day-Lewis delivering his pitch-perfect anecdotes while treading the boards, while the House of Representatives exchanges would be a marvelous thing to witness on stage.

If Spielberg has made any missteps, it is ironically in casting such a well-established supporting cast.   There are so many other players that it is easy to get distracted in spotting them all.  That guy from Mad Men.  That bloke from Flight of the Conchords.  Robert California from The American Office.  Robin.  The Pin from Brick.  The pedo from Little Children. Oh, and John Hawkes, who could well have been Oscar nominated this year in his own right.  Oh, and Sally Field is reeeeeeeally annoying.

But if they are the only things I can find to criticise (and I really do try), then I figure that Lincoln must be a bit special.

Lincoln; 2012; Dir: Steven Spielberg; Stars: Daniel Day-Lewis, Tommy Lee Jones, David Strathairn; 150 mins; 9/10; 12 nominations (Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Cinematography, Best Editing, Best Score, Best Production Design, Best Costume Design, Best Sound Mixing)

Bloscars’ Best Picture chart

1. Lincoln

2. Beasts of the Southern Wild

3.  Argo

4.  Silver Linings Playbook

5.  Les Misérables

6.  Amour

7.  Lif of Pi

8.  Django Unchained

9.  Zero Dark Thirty

85th Academy Awards Nominees: Best Actor

Bradley Cooper for Silver Linings Playbook

Daniel Day-Lewis for Lincoln

Hugh Jackman for Les Misérables

Joaquin Phoenix for The Master

Denzel Washington for Flight

John Hawkes.  Gael Garcia Bernal.  Jean-Louis Trintignant. Mads Mikkelsen.  Toby Jones.  Ben Affleck.  Jamie Foxx.

We can rely on, at very least, these 7 unfortunate exhibits to prove just how strong the Best Actor category is at this year’s Academy Awards.  And the great thing is that, despite the wonderful performances of these above gentlemen, the five who got the nod are no less deserving.

Plus, they’re all very different.  Denzel Washington’s drug-addled alcoholic pilot shares similar traits to his two other Oscar-winning characters from Glory and Training Day.  Behind a smart-talking super confident facade there lies a deep trouble and ultimately false pride, which will eventually result in his demise.  Bradley Cooper is also very believable in Silver Linings as a troubled soul overcoming inner-demons.  And, talking of troubled souls, Phoenix is the very epitome of a mentally and physically lost child.  Accused by some critics of chewing the scenery, I found his central role in Paul Thomas Anderson’s flawed treatise as utterly compelling and just a little disturbing.  While Hugh Jackman’s Jen Valjean is the role the Australian was born to play (yep, a Frenchman with an American accent), and he plays it devilishly well.  Why, he’s even better than Russell Crowe.

And yet, despite the immense caliber of performances on show, somehow honest Abe still stands head, shoulders and stovepipe hat above the others.  Once again, Daniel Day-Lewis has managed to metamorphosise himself from an ostensibly mild-mannered unassuming chap, to something completely unforgettable and iconic.  To say that the performance for his inevitable third Oscar is on a level with his Christy Brown (My Left Foot) and Daniel Plainview (There Will Be Blood) is the highest and most reverential praise that I can bestow.

The measured yet authoritative portrayal of an almost legendary figure, is so beguiling, that not even the Wilkes-Booth ancestry would begrudge him the Oscar.

Daniel Day-Lewis in/as Lincoln

Who should win: Daniel Day-Lewis

Who will win: Daniel Day-Lewis

BAFTArgo

…and then Argo won another major pre-Oscars award.  Yea…I know.  Plus, Ben Affleck won Best Director.  Yes, I know he’s not nominated in that category at the Academy Awards.  I know, nuts isn’t it.  Actually no, you’re wrong…just because Argo won at the PGA Awards, Golden Globes and Baftas, that doesn’t make it a dead cert for the Oscar.  Aha, wrong again…both The Aviator and Brokeback Mountain did the same clean sweep before getting bettered by Million Dollar Baby and Crash respectively.   Yes, I know Crash is one of the most undeserving films ever to win Best Picture, but the fact remains… But yea, I basically agree that Argo will take some stopping now.  Erm…Lincoln maybe?  Or Life of Pi at a real stretch.  Yea, I reckon Argo will take it too.  Indeed.  Anyway, as I was saying, I’d like one pepperoni deep-pan, a small Hawaiian thin and crispy and two portions of garlic bread.  Oh, and coleslaw.  See you in 30 minutes.  Great.

The gentlemen were duly rewarded for winning the ‘Three identical looking men’ contest (Credit: Stuart Wilson/Getty)

As well as Argo, Daniel Day-Lewis and Anne Hathaway last night continued their relentless stomp towards inevitable Oscar glory.  But Emmanuelle Riva threw a French shaped spanner in the Best Actress works (that isn’t a euphemism, walking off with the shiny-metal-face-mask-thing.  I say walking off, she couldn’t actually be arsed to turn up to a free jolly to London town on Haneke.  But her win left Jessica Chastain and Jennifer Lawrence looking as forlorn as Jean-Louis Trintignant in Armour.

The Best Actress award will go down to the wire, with all three now having scooped big prizes.  While Christoph Waltz took another sinister step towards his second Best Supporting Actor statue.  In the category exclusively populated by former winners, Waltz now has all the momentum and will no doubt be penning another (Tarantino gush-fest) acceptance speech ready for the 24th.

Good old Baftas…

All SAG Jazz (and some stuff about the PGA Awards an’ all)

Phew.  The Oscar race didn’t half just het up.

In fact, it’s now even hotter than Jennifer Lawrence at the 2011 Oscars ceremony.  Yes indeed sir…that hot.

It was respectively the Producers Guild of America (PGA) and Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards, you see; a couple more cracks on the winding, uneven red path to the front door of the Dolby Theatre.

And talking of Miss Lawrence, as I was so pruriently above, she done a big win.  With the oldie, the youngie and the othie oney seemingly making up the numbers for the Academy’s Best Actress nominations, it seems as though its a one-on-one scrap between Lawrence and Chastain (who picked up the the Best Actress in a Drama Golden Globe) for the title.  And, if you’ll allow just a tad more prurience, I would suggest that the only fair way to decide is by making them have a “kiss-off”.  Basically it’s where they have to kiss either (a) eachother; or (b) me, until one or both of them is naked.  True, it’s a complex and cerebral contest, but it’s truly the only just way of deciding who should win the Oscar that my dreams have so far come up with.

Insert joke about Jennifer Lawrence ‘sagging’ here:    [                                                            ] (Credit: PA Images / Chris Pizzello / AP)

Daniel Day-Lewis continued his domination of the Best Actor category, for his portrayal of Honest Abe.  As if this wasn’t already sewn up enough, the SAGs have nailed the  category precisely for the last 9 years.   And even then they rewarded the more deserving candidate, Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Carribean over Sean Penn in Mystic River.

If there’s a dead cert to match D.D-L, it’s young A.H.  Hathaway came away with the Best Supporting Actress honour for her universally accepted breathtaking gadabout in Les Mis.  If she’s been dreaming a dream about winning an Oscar, it’s bound to come true in just under a month.

The most open acting category is the set of five past winners that adorn the Best Supporting Actor cabinet.  Christoph Waltz, who unexpectedly picked up the Golden Globe, was not even nominated at the SAGs.  Leaving the four Oscar nominees (plus Javier Bardem) to indulge in some shiny stuff.  Tommy Lee Jones, for his role in Lincoln, past the finishing line first.  But I’d venture that on the night, Bobby De Niro, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Alan Arkin will all have jacket pockets bulging with pre-prepared acceptance speeches.

The category puts me in mind of the battle for the Best Supporting Actress Oscar in 2008 when Ruby Dee (American Gangster), Cate Blanchett (I’m Not There) and Amy Ryan (Gone Baby Gone) each picked up awards before Tilda Swinton beat them all for her role in Michael Clayton.  This will be the one category that will retain some tension as we approach 24th February.

But this year’s Best Picture race is equally unpredictable.  With Tom Hooper and Kathryn Bigelow missing out for Best Director nods for Les Mis and Zero Dark Thirty respectively, the previously touted favourites seemed to be out of the running for the big prize.

Ben Affleck’s Argo also appeared to be on the casualty list.  Only for it to hit back with a trio of big wins at the Golden Globes, SAGs and PGA Awards.  Although it would be highly unusual for a film to win Best Picture without having also earned the Best Director nomination (only Driving Miss Daisy has achieved it in the last 30 years), one can’t ignore the momentum that it has built over the last few weeks.

Insert joke about Ben Affleck ‘PGAing’ here: [                                 ]. Actually, do you know what, forget that…

I still think that it will take some to beat Spielberg’s latest opus Lincoln, but the voters appear to now be telling Affleck’s flick to Argo-forget-about-the-Best-Director-snub-we’re-all-friends-here-Ben.